Kassady
Five years is a long time to love someone you can’t be with. I’ve been carrying a torch for Brant since our on-again-off-again (mostly off) relationship ended. When he showed back up in my life, I won’t lie – I was vindicated to know that he’d always regretted watching me walk away. I’m getting married in eight months, and Brant has a long-term girlfriend…there’s no way for us to ever be together again. He’ll always be my favorite regret. Or will he?
Brant
I’ve never forgotten her. I know I messed up, big-time, when I let Kassady go. I know I shouldn’t even think about trying to see if we might be able to try again. She’s happy with her new guy and I’m…well, I guess I’ll be fine, too. But if by chance it doesn’t work out for her with him, maybe it will be our turn to do it right.
First of all, technically, Betty Blades wrote this story. But, since I am also Betty Blades, I’m going to talk about it.
Where did the title come from?
If By Chance by Ruth B. Other songs on the playlist include Happier by Ed Sheeran, and i hate u i love you by Gnash.
Why did I write it?
As I recall, I was approached to write a story for a charity anthology. I was trying to get Betty Blades up and running, so I wrote this story. It’s just under 14,000 words, so a long short story or a short novella.
Why Betty Blades?
I like pen names. I like writing different things. Betty Blades, bless her heart, likes to write more traditional romances than Megan Hart does. She’s not quite as spicy as Willow Switch or Estella Lumos, and she doesn’t do horror or thrillers like Mina Hardy. But she’s me, and all of them are me, so if you like Megan Hart books, you might like Betty. She’s always got a guaranteed HEA, and fun tropes like forced proximity, enemies to lovers, only one bed, second chances.
What’s If By Chance about?
Short answer — “Sometimes, the universe has a way of bringing you exactly what you need…even if it’s not exactly when you need it.”
Longer answer — I’m a sucker for a second-chance romance. Why? I guess there’s something so delicious and satisfying about getting to write about the ones that got away…but didn’t get very far. You know, the loves that linger. Getting to write a Happy Ever After for a love story that should’ve been a romance in the first place.
Kassady and Brant met at the wrong time in their lives to find their happiness together, but that doesn’t mean they’re not meant for it.
Why should you read it?
Why should any of us do anything? Do you like romance stories that won’t take up too much of your time? Do you like to read for free (you can read If By Chance free on Theo Reads! You can also pay for it, or read it as part of your subscription) If you answered yes, that’s why you should read this story. If you answered no…well, there’s not much I can do about that. Let’s just go our separate ways. But admit it, you’ll always wonder…what might have been….
That’s cool. You can always come back and have your second-chance romance with If By Chance.
Read an excerpt:
“What? Brant Raden? Oh, no. Girl, no. You should have moved on from him a long, long time ago,” says my best friend, Bethany.
But what does she know?
“It’s not about moving on or not moving on. It’s about…” I trail off. To be honest, I’m not sure what it’s about. “Being happy.”
“Were you happy when you were together? Because I recall you being pretty miserable.” She drags a fry through a puddle of ketchup and tucks it between lips painted the same shade. She’s all done up because she just came from a date. A bad one, apparently, since she’d called me to meet her in the middle of the night at our favorite 24-hour diner.
“I was miserable at the end, sure. But who’s not? If you’re not miserable, why would you end things?” I contemplate my platter of eggs, hash browns, pancakes, toast with jam. The Delightful Diner has the best coffee I’ve ever had, and if I drink even a single cup I’m going to be awake until tomorrow night. I drink it anyway. What’s a few hours of lost sleep? I’d only be tossing and turning, anyway. Dreaming of him.
Bethany eyes her enormous burger. Onion rings spill over the side of it, and glops of gooey mayo and mustard have leaked out, too. She’s going to eat the entire disgusting mess and complain about her stomach hurting, but we both know it in advance, so there’s no point in pretending she won’t.
“Isn’t that just proving my point, though? If it doesn’t turn to misery, you keep doing it. But it did, so you broke up.” She points a crimson-tipped finger toward me, like what she’s said isn’t something I’ve thought myself, over and over again.
“I just saw him, Bethany. And from afar. I didn’t talk to him.”
“But now you can’t stop thinking about him. You can’t stop remembering him. Did you pull out the old bottle of his cologne and sniff it?”
“I never should have told you about that.” I shake my head, but I can’t deny it. The bottle had been way, way at the back of the linen closet, but I’d had no trouble finding it. Smelling it in the bottle was nothing like smelling it on his skin, but even so, the scent had transported me back in time.
Bethany laughs, but sympathetically. “You should throw it out, Kass. Why torture yourself?”
“I’m not torturing myself. I’m just…I don’t know. Letting myself remember instead of pretending I forget.”
“That’s a well you don’t want to throw yourself down,” Bethany says.
I poke at my food with my fork, but instead of eating anything, I drink more coffee. It’s rich and strong and warm, and the mug feels good in my hands. I laugh, just a little. This woman is my oldest friend. We have no secrets from each other.
“I’m not throwing myself down any well. I just had a moment of indulgence.”
“You stalked his girlfriend,” she says, too loud.
“Online! Only online.” I look around, hoping nobody has overheard. Especially not someone I might know. I don’t see any faces I recognize, but even so. The last thing in the world I need is anyone listening in to this conversation. “Anyway, she doesn’t know that. He won’t, either. I just checked her out. You’d have done the same.” I put down the mug and pick up my fork in one hand, knife in the other. I’m suddenly starving, or maybe I want to stuff my mouth full of food so I don’t have to answer any more questions.
“Truth. But I’m not the one hung up on a guy who broke my heart five years ago.”
I layer an egg with hash browns and a slice of pancake, savoring the mingling of flavors. Brant used to tease me about my breakfast food habits. He was strictly a two eggs over easy kind of guy. Side of wheat toast, butter, no jelly. He’d eat one bite a time, precisely, keeping every bit of food separate on his plate. All these years later, and I can still recall exactly what he’d order in a diner or any place else. I still remember everything.
“I have never loved anyone the way I loved him. That’s all.” I shrug, like it doesn’t matter, but of course it does.
“You haven’t let yourself even try.”
I chew slowly. Swallow. I take a drink of coffee, all before answering her.
“I’m engaged. That doesn’t count as trying?”
Bethany rolls her eyes. “Do you really want to marry Mark?”
“I wouldn’t have said yes if I didn’t.”
“But…Kass.” Bethany looks serious now. Her brow furrows. Her lips press together as she struggles for the right words. “Do you love him?”
“Of course I love him.” The words taste like lies, but I’m trying hard to tell the truth. “I want to love him.”
“You can’t make yourself fall in love with someone.” She points another fry at me. She’s very fond of pointing to emphasize her words. “You can stop yourself, though.”
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