Megan Hart

On the way to Orlando. Not Bloom.

Testing twitter/blog/fb updates.

I knew it. I KNEW I had Kushiel’s Justice, but I couldn’t find it, and therefore, bought it using my gift card. I finally got around to cleaning my office today (getting ready for RT) and I found my original copy! What does this mean for you, and why should you care?

Be the first person to comment to this entry with KUSHIEL in the message and I’ll send you the paperback copy I bought by accident. It’s not pristine, I did start reading it, but hey. If you don’t have it and you like Carey, I’ll send it to you.

And guess what else I found? Yeah! An extra copy of Undercover! You want it? Be the first person to comment to this entry with UNDERCOVER in the message and I’ll send it to you.

I have to keep this U.S. only though because I won’t have time to hit the post office before I go and can only mail stuff from home.

Ready? Set…GO!

M

PS– you can only try for one, please let someone else have a turn. So pick one only.

Over at Riding With the Top Down!

Well, well, well, Amazon.com, how does it feel when the mighty hammer of smut readers and queers and kinksters comes down to smite you?

I don’t need to reprint the email that people are receiving after complaining to Amazon.com about the whole ratings stripping debacle, but I do like that they admitted it was “embarrassing and “ham-fisted.” (You can read the whole reply in Melissa’s comment in my previous entry. Thanks, Melissa!)

You know, saying “sorry” goes a long, long way. It would be nice if more people realized this. I’m not entirely mollified — I’m not convinced Amazon.com had an evil plan to segregate or censor based on sexual preferences, but I’m not unconvinced there was something puritanical afoot. But I *am* pleased that they at least acknowledged there was some fuckery, and that there seems to be an attempt to fix it, and while I’m not trumpeting Amazon’s horn, I’m reserving my eternal condemnation until I see how this plays out.

In other news, anyone seen Adventureland? Wow. It wasn’t what I expected AT ALL, but it was sweet and poignant and evocative, and it reminded me so much of college summers working in a theme park,and just youth in general, and a lot of things — including 1987. I loved it. I have to go buy the soundtrack now! You know how hearing music in a movie makes you remember it and say “awwww!” and then you want it? Yeah.

Appointments today. Should get some writing in, too, somewheres along the way. My mousing hand hurts, though.I need a massage. I also need something to wear for Thursday…! Don’t forget, I’ll be doing this:

IN THE FLESH EROTIC READING SERIES
VIRGIN NIGHT
April 16th at 8 PM
AT HAPPY ENDING LOUNGE, 302 BROOME STREET, NYC
(B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey or F/V to 2nd Avenue, http://www.happyendinglounge.com)
Admission: Free
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676

http://inthefleshreadingseries.blogspot.com

In The Flesh is proud to present its second annual Virgin Night, featuring new authors and first-time readers. Texan Jenny Block reads from Open: Love, Sex, and Life in an Open Marriage, Smart Bitches, Trashy Books blogger and co-author of Beyond Heaving Bosoms Sarah Wendell shares the sexy side of romance, memoirist (I’m Perfect, You’re Doomed) and ex-Jehovah’s Witness Kyria Abrahams talks about losing her virginity, Jehovah’s Witness style, while Nerve.com Scanner blogger Emily Farris delivers a sex story and erotic romance novelist (Stranger, Dirty) Megan Hart reads her steamy prose, along with Gideon Levy of Kinky Jews and Sugarbutch Chronicles blogger Sinclair Sexsmith, and first-time reader Nicolette Dixon. Books will be available for sale by Mobile Libris. Hosted and curated by Rachel Kramer Bussel (The Mile High Club, Do Not Disturb, Spanked). Free candy and cupcakes will be served.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!

M

As far as rankings go, I don’t really care if Amazon doesn’t “rank” my book — I don’t really need to spend my days checking my Amazon rankings to see how popular I am. Or not. (I’m totally not saying I don’t check the rankings, because I DO, I’m just saying I don’t NEED to. It’s a time suck and can lead to false elation and exacerbated depression.)

So no, I don’t really care if my books don’t show their sales rankings.

What I care about is that by stripping the rankings, it deletes my books from being FOUND, essentially. And you know what…I’m not really sure how many people stumble across my books by accident on a website the way they might in the bookstore. I don’t browse around Amazon.com just seeing what’s out there, or typing in search strings to find books on subjects — mostly. Sometimes, but not often. Usually I know what I want, I type it in, I find it, I buy it. I do a lot more browsing in the brick and mortar stores where I can flip through the pages. But I do read the Amazon recs, or “people who bought this bought this” stuff, which does lead me to impulse purchases or to find books I wasn’t looking for, specifically, and I know there are people who DO search randomly for things like “erotic romance” or whatever — um, yeah, that’s the reason for TAGS, right, Amazon?

So the fact that my books and thousands of others have had their rankings stripped doesn’t tick me off solely on the basis of them not showing how well they’re selling or not, but that by doing so, they’ve made the books UNFUCKINGSEARCHABLE.

I typed in the specific name of a book AND my name, and my book didn’t come up. How messed up is that? The book is there, you can buy it, and Amazon.com will surely take their cut of that sale. But how can you buy it if you can’t find it?

It’s ridiculous.

And arbitrary, because not ALL of my books were stripped, and just go around the ‘net to see examples of porn keeping its rankings while self-help books get stripped.

Look, I get that maybe you don’t want Granny or Little Billy stumbling on HARD COCKS THREE: The anthology of Frat Boy Erotica if they’re trying to find books on raising chickens or information about joining a frat. I mean, that might not be what they’re looking for, that eeeebil GAY PRON! But if Google can have a “safe search” function, why not Amazon.com? That doesn’t get rid of the issue about content being marked “adult” but hell, I have no problem with being marked ADULT. I am an adult, I write adult material, and I don’t think what I write is appropriate for kids to read — but I surely don’t think they’ll be scarred by seeing a cover image or reading the titles. However, whatever, separate adult content from searches, but let that be the CUSTOMER’S CHOICE.

My kid tried to get on Facebook and was directly to a hard core porn site that made ME turn my head. That shit is ALL OVER THE fucking internet. I get it, Amazon, I get it. But let that be my choice, not yours.

Don’t police me. Don’t keep me from buying what I want. Because I could go over there right now and buy up every single butt plug you have in stock, and I’d be able to do that by searching on products.

Hey, there’s a thing. Amazon has a nice return policy. Let’s all go order vibes and buttplugs and dirty books and then return them all a day later.

I’m sure they’re all “defective.” Especially the butt plugs.

M

THIS is what you get when you search Megan Hart, Taking Care of Business.

Notice anything strange about that? Yeah. That’s not my book. Not even close to my book. Do a search on my name, and it will bring up some of my books, and by clicking around you can certainly get to others, but doing a search for my exact name and title of a book that’s been ranked in the top 20,000 of Amazon sales, and what do you get?

It’s like I don’t even exist.

So, FUCK YOU AMAZON. I’ve spent a fuckton of money through you over the past few years, and was actually bemoaning the state of things last week when I had to wait for my books because I’d ordered them from someone else.

Well, guess what? I’ll haul my ass to the store before I order from you. And believe me when I say I spent a lot of money on Amazon.com — because I don’t EVER go to the store unless I have to. I shop from home all the time. And you just lost my thousands of dollars of business, my recommendations, MY EVERYTHING.

M

And here we are in a new one, already. RT is one week away (for me, I’m getting there early.) I have seven days to finish packing, clean my house, prepare my family for my absence…and write.

Oh, yeah, somehow that’s sort of fallen by the wayside over the past couple weeks. That’s life, though, it happens that way. I’ve had quite a week, one I don’t really care to repeat, but the kids have one more day off and then it’s back to a routine. Sort of.

I was going to rant about the Amazon debacle but I’m too tired right now. Let’s just hope they resolve it, because I spend a lot of money at Amazon that I’ll have to spend some other place, instead, if they don’t straighten up and fly right.

I am nowhere near finishing the first draft of my third Order of Solace novel, but I was stupid for even thinking I might be before RT. And yes, life intervened and there were circumstances beyond my control, but…also, I have to own that I have been moving slowly. That’s how it happens sometimes, though, you finish a book and need some time in between to sort of recharge. I really should learn to just DO THAT, instead of thinking I’ll start right in on something else and feeling guilty when I don’t.

In other news, I started playing Obscure: The Aftermath, and let me tell ya, it ain’t no Resident Evil 4.

What else, what else?

Oh, well, I guess I just wanted to say that I think it would be nice if we all might remember that posting holiday wishes on our own blogs or Facebooks or whatever is really nice and all, and fine, but when you post them on someone ELSE’s blog or FB or whatever, really…make sure you know the person and be sure they actually celebrate the holiday you’re wishing them a “happy” of — because if they don’t, you might actually annoy them instead of make them smile. And, contrariwise, should someone post something on their own FB or blog or whatnot that disagrees with your personal world-view, just remember that YOU chose to go there, that person didn’t come over to your house and leave it in a flaming bag on your front porch.

Also: I am hugged out. I will be totally happy if nobody touches me or hugs me for about 72 hours straight. And I’m not even kidding, I’d be perfectly fine without any sort of physical contact for three days. I am really, really tired of being hugged.

That it is all.

Goodnight. Or, good morning!

M

Me-n-my bangs are trying to write but the sun’s making it hard.

Now I feel like listening to hours of John Denver, and why not? Why not, I say! Yeah, I own the Essential John Denver on CD. Now I guess I’ll have to rip it into my iPod. All because of some darned sunshine.

What songs have you unexpectedly had a yearning to listen to?

M